The Soul Borrower

A Blog of Photography and my Lifeography


I’ve done an interview with Col on his blog: Grasp the Nettle. Go check it out.

Thanks again Col.

Just a reminder, I am still looking for a few people not from the US to ask a few questions about Health Care in their country. If you are interested, email me at Remove the “nospam”.

Thanks 🙂


February 9, 2009 - Posted by | Uncategorized


  1. Any luck with volunteers yet Jake?

    Comment by Col | February 10, 2009 | Reply

  2. A comment from Josh:

    “I’ve always hoped that something good would happen to me. That I would meet some young hunk in the locker room and have steaming hot sex in the sauna, but all I’ve done is hope. I really haven’t seized or looked for any opportunity, and I regret that the most. I’ve still got a lot of life in front of me, but I feel as if many opportunities have been lost.”

    I think this is a very telling comment, along with the observation that after high school we can pretty much re-invent ourselves. I didn’t actually re-invent myself as much as I stopped worrying if people would reject me if they found out I am gay. I had sex with guys and girls all through high school, but have stuck with guys only since I got to college.

    Believe me, there are opportunities to have sex and have fun on campus. I even do my roommate who claims to be straight, and it must be okay, because we just decided to room together sophomore year. You just have to be kind of attuned to guys looking at you. Don’t be afraid to start conversations.

    Jake, you mentioned the weight issue, and I think that might be an inhibiting factor for you. If you’re tall and muscular, then 250 lbs isn’t so much weight. But if it’s just upholstery then do something about it. I had to be very careful last semester. I got to college and got too caught up in academics and social life and my excercise and running and weight room time dropped way off. There’s what they call “The Freshmen Fifteen” which is the fifteen pounds first semester freshmen gain just because they suddenly go inactive. So Toby (my roommate) and I started swimming in the college pool every day, and running,and I trimmed back down. I’ll say this in as nice a way as I can dude, but if you want to attract guys you have to be attractive. Do the best you can, and remember that for better or worse most gay guys our age are air-headed idiots and totally appearance driven.

    You come across as an intelligent and thinking person. To me, that’s more valuable than outward appearance. I’ve had a sexual experience with a guy who was truly stunningly goodlooking. But once the sexual release was over, there was nothing to talk about. Nothing. Hang in there Jake, some guy is gonna be really lucky to get you.


    Comment by Col | February 11, 2009 | Reply

  3. A comment from torchy!:

    well, i told u col that i’d catch up on ur interviews when i was less busy, but i made the mistake of reading the first sentence. doh.

    jake: pleased to meet you, i like ur outlook on life – and u have a fascinating story.

    Comment by Col | February 11, 2009 | Reply

  4. Tee said…

    Okay, here it goes. My comment.

    First of all, I believe I owe you guys an apology. It took me an awful long time to start to read this interview. I guess the size scared the crap out of me, so I didn’t want to read it at first. Lazy, mean and selfish, I know. But blogs aren’t supposed to be novels either. Anyways, I felt bad about doing so (especially after your last entry, Col), so here I am, after reading the whole deal thoroughly.

    I think that what you said about the Internet is very true. The Internet is a very useful tool that allows us to build a “second life” without having to get very involved with older people. We’ve created an entirely different kind of society, with the only difference that it’s online and it lets us do things anonymously. But we still don’t know everything about it. It could be more isolating, more dangerous. Sure, it gives us useful information and some brilliant examples, but “it has become a safe haven where I will never be able to get out actually meet someone.” Well said.

    I really enjoyed the interview. I admire you for having the courage to share your life with us.

    Also, Col, I think these interviews are a brilliant idea. They tell us a lot about the people whose blogs we’ve been reading all this time. Some things surprise me, some things sound strangely familiar. I wish I could’ve filled one out either, but I’m not such a talker. Plus, there’s the language barrier.

    Anyway, great job. Both of you.

    Comment by Col | February 11, 2009 | Reply

  5. I don’t live in the US, but I don’t really know much about health care issues either. If you’re intrested post a reply here and I’ll e-mail you!

    Comment by Emma | February 12, 2009 | Reply

  6. justskatinby said…

    All I can say is WOW. How candid and brave to reveal so much of your self.

    February 12, 2009 4:57 AM

    Comment by Col | February 12, 2009 | Reply

  7. mirrorboy said…

    That was great, and really interesting. I wish my answers sounded as intelligent as yours Jake. 😉

    February 12, 2009 5:18 AM

    Comment by Col | February 12, 2009 | Reply

  8. Hey Emma, I’m looking for ‘older’ people: maybe 25+ish, that have had health care or paid for it in some way in the past and/or present. If you think you may still be interested, let me know and I can send you the questions and than you can decide. It isn’t very long.

    Thanks a bunch!

    Comment by Jake | February 12, 2009 | Reply

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